Sushant Singh Rajput: the outcast

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sushant singh rajput is a star forever, why does his death feel so personal?..

'He is such a good actor, he must play the lead.' That is what amma and I had said when we saw Sushant Singh Rajput in his television debut.

He was playing the role of the hero's brother. 

 We could not hold back our excitement when we saw Sushant's contagious smile as he removed a dupatta from his face, in the popular TV show Pavitra Rishta's promo. 

We were both very glad that he got a big break and that our prediction came true. 

 Sushant's career growth felt personal. We saw him evolve from the small screen to dance reality shows and eventually to Bollywood with 'Kai Po Che' (2013).After that, I’d spot him in advertisements, on hoardings and magazine covers. He seemed so optimistic and assured in the success story he was carving out for yourself.

His was a exceptional journey, from a small-town lad who dropped out of one of India's best engineering colleges to achieve victory in showbiz.

Sushant's on-screen roles reflected his real-life persona. Be it Pavitra Rishta's Manav - the ideal nice guy or Kai Po Che's Ishaan- a former district-level cricketer, who wanted to set up an academy to help aspiring players.

None can forget his portrayal of former Indian cricket team captain MS Dhoni in Neeraj Pandey's 2016 blockbuster. In MS Dhoni: The Untold Story, he was incredible. Each time I recall the film, I see Dhoni in him – he was so flawless, so under his skin. He trained for a year and half, tuning his batting, including "captain cool's" famous "helicopter shot". Master Blaster,Sachin Tendulkar assumed he was a cricketer when he saw him practising.

He got to play an engineer on the big screen in his last theatrical release 'Chhichhore' (2019), which is one of my most favourite films because it is so relatable.

And then one day, he was gone and his demise hit us hard. Sushant was rare and unique. I bet none would have imagined an actor to have a telescope at home.

He was as keen about astronomy as he was about acting. Sushant proved that one did not need to leave behind their past dreams in order to chase new ones.

He fondly remembered himself as an engineering student.This again made him unique as many who enter the industry from an academic field often ignore their previous lives as something that they did not enjoy.

Actors occasionally talk about playing relatable roles but they barely stress on striking a chord with the people in real life.Yet had he reached out to the many others who love, cherish and admire you, each one I imagine would have reminded you of your achievements, of how difficult it is to mark the place you already had. Their emergence would have repeated that however hopelessly  close to the brink you are, it is not right of you to take your life. Some would have hugged you, given a joy, made you laugh and whipped up your favourite snack.

There, among the stars, near the moon you so avidly looked at through your telescope, encouraging friends to share in his wonder. Each would have wanted you alive and fighting. RIP.Sushant did not have to try. He was one of us.

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