RELATIONSHIP
(Shobika Ravichandran )

Remember when Cinderella and Snow White found their Prince Charming, fell in love in the forest, then got married and lived happily ever after? Well, no one ever told us what happens after they live happily ever after. They don’t talk about the work that it takes to maintain the love and romance once the newness has worn off. In this article, you will be introduced to basic and useful ideas that are necessary to build and maintain a healthy and long-lasting relationship with your significant other, after the happily ever after.

 Know your self :

Oftentimes people get into a relationship before taking the time to figure out who they are and what they need. They may spend more time researching their perfect car, which they will have for a short time than they will research their needs, wants and goals for their perfect relationship, which they expect to have for a lifetime.
Once you discover your reasons for being in a relationship it is important to explore your goals and make sure your partner has a similar vision: for example, a long-term committed relationship versus friends with benefits.
Your expectations and values are also important concepts to consider. You cannot expect your partner to be something that you yourself are not. For example, if you want your partner to be faithful, you might need to consider your own track record with fidelity.

Identify a healthy relationship :

Once you have explored why you want a relationship and what you are looking for, you are ready to learn how to find a healthy one. A healthy relationship is considered interdependent, while an unhealthy relationship is considered codependent.
 A codependent relationship is one in which both partners are dependent on each other for their identity and the fulfilment of their emotional needs.
 An interdependent relationship is one in which each partner is whole and complete. They know who they are and have developed an independent lifestyle.

Learn effective communication skills :

The number one complaint couples have is their inability to communicate effectively with each other. Communication is one of the key ingredients for building a strong foundation in a relationship.
Therefore, before trying to have an important conversation with your significant other it is helpful to ask if this is a good time to talk. This way you can ensure his/her undivided attention. One rule of thumb, if either of you is hungry and/or tired, this is definitely not a good time to talk.

Become comfortable with conflict :

Many couples struggle with conflict; they either fear it or avoid it. This is usually due to their misunderstanding of it. A conflict is a disagreement in perspectives, beliefs, values and ideas that generally occurs when one’s needs are being infringed upon or not being met. What causes an escalation in conflict are the strong emotions that are attached to it.